And now for an experiment. You ever play that game where someone writes a sentence and someone adds to it and you pass it around until you have a group-written story? That's what we will attempt here. Except the story will relate to food because this is, after all, a food blog.
So this is how we'll play. I will write the first sentence and number it (1). Whoever comes along next will write the next sentence and number it (2). If two people respond at the same time and both number their sentence (2) (or 3 or so on) the next person can choose which sentence to take and build off that one. For example:
(1) Mary had a little lamb.
(2) She loved her lamb very much.
(2) The lamb was made of iron.
The next commenter can choose which to build from.
(3) Iron, however, made Mary's skin itch.
If someone writes something obscene or attempts to derail the story, the next commenter can number their sentence with the same number to offer an alternative. For example:
(1) Mary had a little lamb.
(2) The lamb had a big vagina.
The next commenter, instead of writing (3) can writes (2) and offer an alternative.
The game ends when I, The Amateur Gourmet, write the last sentence and end the story. I do urge all participants to keep it related to food.
And now for the story. This story is called The Muffin Man. Here is the first sentence:
(1) David Daniels ate a muffin every day of his life.
Comments (44)
His goal was to try every type of muffin that has ever been thought of.
Posted by Renee | November 8, 2006 2:18 AM
(3) These muffins were from the goddess Ina Garten, who lived in a castle in the magical kingdom of Hampton.
Posted by Lisa | November 8, 2006 2:18 AM
(4) With time, of course, it became boring to eat a muffin from the same baker everyday, a change had to come along.
Posted by Hande | November 8, 2006 3:19 AM
(5) Sandra Lee, noticing David's boredom with Ina, offered her semi-homemade muffins to David.
Posted by A different Adam | November 8, 2006 3:29 AM
(4) Being 27, and having started at the age of 3, he had tasted more than 9000 muffins so far.
Posted by Marcin | November 8, 2006 3:34 AM
(5) Morgan Spurlock had once given him a supersized McMuffin. Big Bird donated one with sesame seeds and I said I liked the stud type.
Posted by Jools | November 8, 2006 5:12 AM
(4) Ina had a palindromic expression when it came to her favorite food- "Sniff'um, muffins."
Posted by pitofmystomach | November 8, 2006 6:12 AM
(6) but Dave noticed rigth away that the muffin was not 100% home made, and decided he needed to seacrh more.
Posted by Arthur | November 8, 2006 6:48 AM
(7) David also noticed that eating all those muffins had made him thirsty, so he decided he needed to search for the perfect beverage to complement the perfect muffin. He set off to....
Posted by pageycooks | November 8, 2006 7:40 AM
Then he realized that above all for baking (especially for this blog) looms Martha
Posted by JOnathan | November 8, 2006 8:32 AM
Then he realized that above all for baking (especially for this blog) looms Martha
Posted by JOnathan | November 8, 2006 8:32 AM
(8) ...find that drink by consulting the great chocolatarian David Lebovitz, as he knew nothing would compliment the great chocolate chip muffins more than a chocolate beverage.
Posted by Jason Sholar | November 8, 2006 8:47 AM
(9)The Lebovitz said "I will help you in your quest, but first you must bring me a..."
Posted by jon | November 8, 2006 9:10 AM
(10)..better English-French dictionary to...
Posted by Shvetha | November 8, 2006 9:13 AM
(11) correctly translate how much I loathe Sandra Lee, though she does have a great rack.
Posted by AuntJone | November 8, 2006 9:39 AM
"Rack" David muttered. "That's it! I've forgotten all other food types like rack of lamb and rack roast...my god,
where is my protein." David stumbled off towards...
Posted by Vanessa Balchen | November 8, 2006 9:49 AM
(13) ...a place that provides a happy marriage of protein with breakfast (muffin or otherwise). then he remembers that fellow blogger Ed Levine mentioned tasty breakfast sandwiches a few days ago and so he decides to...
Posted by the pauper | November 8, 2006 10:11 AM
A Recap
(1) David Daniels ate a muffin every day of his life.
(2) His goal was to try every type of muffin that has ever been thought of.
(3) These muffins were from the goddess Ina Garten, who lived in a castle in the magical kingdom of Hampton.
(4) With time, of course, it became boring to eat a muffin from the same baker everyday, a change had to come along.
(5) Sandra Lee, noticing David's boredom with Ina, offered her semi-homemade muffins to David.
(6) but Dave noticed rigth away that the muffin was not 100% home made, and decided he needed to seacrh more.
(7) David also noticed that eating all those muffins had made him thirsty, so he decided he needed to search for the perfect beverage to complement the perfect muffin. He set off to....
(8) ...find that drink by consulting the great chocolatarian David Lebovitz, as he knew nothing would compliment the great chocolate chip muffins more than a chocolate beverage.
(9)The Lebovitz said "I will help you in your quest, but first you must bring me a..."
(10)..better English-French dictionary to...
(11) correctly translate how much I loathe Sandra Lee, though she does have a great rack.
(12) "Rack" David muttered. "That's it! I've forgotten all other food types like rack of lamb and rack roast...my god,
where is my protein." David stumbled off towards...
(13) ...a place that provides a happy marriage of protein with breakfast (muffin or otherwise). then he remembers that fellow blogger Ed Levine mentioned tasty breakfast sandwiches a few days ago and so he decides to...
Posted by T-Man78 | November 8, 2006 10:18 AM
find himself a butcher because at this point muffins are making him a bit ill.
Posted by jeannie | November 8, 2006 10:18 AM
He was going to find the best butcher in New York, who is none other than...
Posted by hopcat | November 8, 2006 10:43 AM
14)scramble an egg. Because it was cheaper and faster, but still a viable source of protein. But....
Posted by Shelley (Pink House) | November 8, 2006 11:10 AM
...a mysterious woman living in a Chelsea penthouse whose collection of sterling-silver butchering utensils include...
Posted by leica | November 8, 2006 11:13 AM
17) meat muffin pans. She butchered him a herd of meat muffins, plopped them in their pans and stuck them in the oven.
Posted by Aoife | November 8, 2006 11:21 AM
But what was that mystery meat inside the muffins?
Posted by mikeyrad | November 8, 2006 12:14 PM
19) It was beef tongue
Posted by Edyta | November 8, 2006 12:37 PM
but not your usual beef tongue found in any Jewish deli, oh no - it was a tongue of extraordinary size, befitting perhaps the wooly mammoth.
Posted by rayo | November 8, 2006 12:55 PM
21) "Size does matter" exclaimed David with great gusto, lifting the mammoth muffin to his lips.
Posted by A Big Fan of the AG | November 8, 2006 2:08 PM
He had always liked tongue almost as much as his mother.
Posted by nardac | November 8, 2006 2:20 PM
22) David had no sooner swallowed the tongue muffin when a knock at the door revealed a scantily clad Madonna who proclaimed...
Posted by Kevin | November 8, 2006 3:44 PM
23) "EXQUISITE! A Wooly Mammoth Tongue Muffin! I absolutely demand you give it to me at once; it is the last item I need for my quest!"
Posted by banana | November 8, 2006 4:19 PM
(24) Without hesitation, David coughed, regurgitating the muffin which he handed over to Madonna before reaching for another muffin, fresh from the pan.
Posted by rachel | November 8, 2006 7:25 PM
(25) Madonna thanked and promptly vanished in a puff of smoke. Smoke!, David thought. I've never tried to smoke a muffin. He whipped up a new batch of batter and ...
Posted by Nat | November 8, 2006 8:20 PM
made certain that it was trans fat free because he did not...
Posted by PaPa | November 8, 2006 8:45 PM
(26)...fired up his Weber Grill. But first he had a dilemma - should he use mesquite, hickory, or cedar woodchips to smoke is muffin? David thought long and hard about this.
Posted by O'malley | November 8, 2006 9:58 PM
After thinking for sometime on how to smoke his muffin, David decided to use Cherry wood instead!
Posted by sarah | November 8, 2006 10:36 PM
"But if I smoke muffins with Cherry wood, what will be the filling!?", David cried.
Posted by Kelly | November 8, 2006 10:43 PM
What goes with cherry? Dave asked himself. Of course, cherries. And maybe some ...
Posted by Ilana | November 8, 2006 10:51 PM
(30)Clotted Madagascar vanilla cream. After smoking a batch of cherry muffins, he thought it would be lovely to share them with ...
Posted by M.J. | November 9, 2006 12:16 AM
(30)Clotted Madagascar vanilla cream. After smoking a batch of cherry muffins, he thought it would be lovely to share them with ...
Posted by M.J. | November 9, 2006 12:16 AM
The Amateur Gourmet! Who devoured the smokey muffins (blogged about them) and asked David for a favor, which was...
Posted by L | November 9, 2006 2:14 AM
...to build him a glorious muffin statue in his honor.
Posted by Hans | November 9, 2006 11:52 AM
But when he saw the muffin statue the Amateur Gourmet shrieked in horror at the sheer gawdiness of the statue...
Posted by Jane | November 9, 2006 9:33 PM
The statue had been changed to be a "NYC meat muffin" staute where the muffins were filled with Gray's Papaya hot dogs rather than beef tounge!
Posted by roze | November 10, 2006 11:04 AM
And much like the time a woman saw the face of the Madonna on a tortilla, the Adam was sure he could see the face of Sandra Lee in the meat muffin statue.
Posted by leah | November 17, 2006 2:34 PM